Hey There Lonely Girl

Dear young people who suffer from low self-esteem. Who spend hours trying to look and act a certain way because you think no one will ever want/desire/love you. News Flash: It really doesn't matter how unattractive you are or how unattractive society and pop culture tells you that you are- you'll get laid. Don't worry.

I'm mean really. If you lived in college housing then you discovered this pretty quickly. Sure there are the "hot" people. The ones who dress nice and who make themselves appear unattainable. But really, as long as you're not smelly or a total social pariah, as long as you find that group of people who share the same interests as you, you will find amor.

Think about this: at my college there were pirates. No, it did not have a nautical studies major, nor were there any large bodies of water present. There were simply some dudes who must have been seriously into D&D. Who had long greasy hair. Who enjoyed parachute pants, large black boots, flouncy shirts, and who were very talented at creating swords and other pirate-like weapons out of cardboard, foam, and duct tape. And all of these guys had girlfriends. Not just girlfriends but wenches. Girls with flowy skirts and possibly even a corset thrown in there.

Then there was a rather rotund guy who always-ALWAYS- wore a poncho. A giant, floor-length poncho. (Who I actually got to know a tiny bit because we ended up being R.A.s in the same building for a semester, nice guy.) Not only did he always wear the poncho but he always had Birkenstocks on. In the winter. Because, oh yes, in the spring/summer he went shoe-less. And he had a serious girlfriend. So serious she was moving back home with him after they graduated and I'm pretty sure at that point they would be married. Whether or not they did is beside the point. The point is this guy was not a Kardashian or a Brad Pitt and he was getting some. And he was in love.

Then there is Mark and I. I am the poster child for low self-esteem. I wear ill-fitting clothing. I love hats in the winter because I don't have to worry about my frizzy hair that hasn't been professionally cut in years. I'm borderline overweight. I've had chub in the same place since the 4th grade so it's going NOWHERE. I have terrible posture. I never wear contact lenses. Mark is a unicorn. And he has hobbit feet. And oh the farting......
But anyway. I love him. And he loves me. At least he loves my cooking. But we have each other and in the core of me I'm happy. I might not be a bouncy, happy-go-lucky person but even on my bluest day I know I have the super important stuff.

So:
Dear Young Person. Stop wasting money on things that you think other's will judge you favorably on but you don't really like. Stop trying to make friends with people who seem cool but treat you like shit. Just be you and go out and find someone who'll notice. It might take awhile but my goodness, we've got years.